Earlier in the week I posted a question on Twitter/Facebook...........
What do you see when you look in the mirror? Is it what God sees or what the world sees?
I wish I could always see the me God sees in me, the woman he has created me to be, but usually I see what the world and Satan wants me to see.............
When I look into the mirror I see a scared little girl hiding underneath a blanket, her grandmother made for her, from the monsters in the closet. A little girl afraid of rejection from those around her, worried about disappointing people in her life, scared to be a failure. I see someone who can't do a darn thing right. The young woman who can't seem do good enough in school to please the teachers on her assignments, The shy girl in class who doesn't dress the right way because I don't have the right clothes or because I'm not good at sports. When I see the reflection looking back at me I see a woman who looks terrible without make-up and who just doesn't measure up to every other mother out there. I am the girl in the corner who feels so horrible about herself that she never gets to really show her full potential.
Now, if I look at myself through God's eyes I can see a TOTALLY different person. I see a woman who is a wonderfully and beautifully made daughter of God. You see this girl doesn't hide beneath that blanket, she uses it as her cape to fight off the bad guys like Super-Woman! She isn't afraid of rejection or disappointment or failure because in God she is able to pick herself up and realize that He loves her no matter what. In God I am perfect just how he made me...........I am confident in myself and my abilities. I may stumble but God is there to pick me up and dust me off so I can keep trying. Through the eyes of God I know I am loved, I know I am a good mother, wife, and friend. In God in know that there is a reason I am on Earth. I AM WORTHY! I DESERVE ALL THE GOD HAS FOR ME!
I have always struggled with my self-image, there are many things that contribute to the way I view myself. I think that is why I try so hard to show my daughters and the teens I work with that you are beautiful and gorgeous just how God made you. It would be a very boring life if we all looked like airbrushed super models! No variety in life is soooooo blah!
I am very lucky to have wonderful man in my life who lifts me up and encourages me. My husband tells me several times a day how beautiful I am, how pretty I am, even when I am pretty sure I look like the proverbial road kill. He would prefer that I not wear make-up. He likes that I am comfortable in jeans and a hoodie or t-shirt. I am pretty low maintenance as far as "girls" go. Even with all that I will probably always struggle with myself. It's just how I am, my early family life and society has shaped that. I work hard to change the way I view myself and I am doing better.
Proverbs 31:30-31 (NIV)
30 Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.
31 Honor her for all that her hands have done, and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.
31 Honor her for all that her hands have done, and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.
What brought all this to me was a great book I am reading called Fresh-Brewed Life by Nicole Johnson, I was reading Chapter 4 - Embrace Your Beauty. In this chapter were a few things that I had to highlight to remind myself that I am just fine the way I am....... 1.)"There is nothing spiritual about hating your own body" 2.)"I thank God for the (insert your name) He created me to be." 3.)"Whenever you seek to wrap your arms around the beauty God has made (including yourself), you are opening like a flower to the sun, saying an enthusiastic YES to God, and it will warm and color your life. 4.) "If you could see His eyes looking at you, you would notice that his whole face radiates love. He is the designer of your form, and he is the first one who said, "She's beautiful." his tone was kind, and his words were true. You can believe him."
One of my favorite songs is by Barlowgirl - Mirror.
